SEX AT THE FREEZER

A couple went to mass and took confession. The husband went into the confessional and said, "Forgive me Father, for I have sinned. While my wife was bending over the freezer I had lustful thoughts and had my way with her." The Priest tried explaining that having sex with one's own wife was not a sin and forgiveness was not needed. Still, the man insisted that he felt guilty. So the priest told him to say three Hail Mary's and be on his way.

Next, the wife went into the confessional and said that while she was leaning over the freezer her husband had his way with her. The priest asked her how long she had been married. She replied it was three years now. The priest tried to explain to her that it was quite proper for married people to have sex and that there was nothing to be guilty about. Still, the woman insisted that she felt guilty so the priest told her to say three Hail Mary's and think no more about it.

As she turned to leave, the woman asked the priest if her and her husband would be banned from the church.

"Banned from the church?! What gave you that idea?" the priest queried.

"Well," she said, "they banned us from the supermarket!"

Tea Strainer

Little Johnny was left to fix lunch. When his mother returned with a friend, she noticed that Johnny had already strained the tea. So the two women sipped their tea happily while having lunch and chit-chatted. Afterwards, when her friend had left, Little Johnny's mother talked to him.

"Was it hard finding the tea strainer in the kitchen?" his mother asked.

"Ma, I couldn't find it, so I used the fly swatter." replied Johnny.